And I guess we’re getting
to that point where life persists and friendships cease – said no
one but me.
Ini
saya mengutip tulisan teman sekelas saya, saudara Apriliyanti Sirait pada tanggal 13
Januari 2016 di grup line :
Till We Meet Again
For the first time in
many years I come to realize what ever happened to “time is so cruel”? I know
there are many twists and turns in relationships as our lives change. Beginning
a new phase of my life could mean facing another long goodbye, one outside my
own comfort zone which is somewhat emotionally tiring.
Over the course of my
life, I’ve had two or three best friends, relationships that ended for one
reason or another. Being a direct, straightforward person has a lot of perks.
As the payoff, not many people can handle it,
not even members of my family – when I speak my mind that is often
misinterpreted as bitchiness and often have zero patience for almost
everything.
The truth is, good friends
are hard to come by. I rarely be the one who puts in all the effort into a
friendship. Yet, Mbak Flo, Desi, Yola, Dea, and Yeski are the exceptions for me
to make it to be a two-way street.
Three years go, I bonded
with them when I enrolled my grad school and never expected that I would spiral
downward when the time comes for me to not be able getting to see them like we
get used to do. They are immensely inspirational and they are people I
genuinely want to meet and talk to on a regular basis. Mba Flo and Desi, my
idols. Mature, kind, loving, patient ladies who are quict to hear, slow to
speak, slow to anger. Yola, what a mood boaster! Always comes with positive
thoughts- never fails to show me a bright side of life, a gentle answer turns
away wrath. Dea, the only one who can always put a big grin on our faces with
her silly jokes and expression, the realiest af I’ve ever met yet remains very
wise and calm. Yeski, the youngest in the group. I would say I could see the
reflection of myself in you as you could be horrible and adorable at the same
time hahaha. The first one who made it, graduate from one of the best univ in
town – WHAT A GREAT ACHIEVEMENT! I am sure you make your parents proud of you,
remember they are watching over you from heaven.
Time flies, we’ll have
different priorities and not on the same path anymore. I can’t stand the
sadness of moving on and leaving all we had behind. Nothing will be the same,
our adventures and all the new friends we’ll meet on the road, but I’ll miss
our open-hearted and free-flowing communication.
Thank you for sweet
memories to remember, thank you for your kind words esp. when I failed on my
thesis seminar – the darkest moment in my grad school years, thank you for your
encouragement that motivates me to be a better person.
Our friendship is one of
the best things that has ever happened to me. My life was incomplete without
you. Till we meet again, my friends. I love you.
April.
***
Saya
bukan orang yang pintar atau berani memamerkan romantisme pertemanan. Namun,
sesungguhnya atau barangkali, saya adalah orang yang paling haus dan suka
merenung-renung soal teman. Suka kelihatan enggak butuh, padahal saya
nangis-nangis deh kalau gak ada teman!
Tulisan
April mungkin mewakilkan apa yang saya rasa begitu saya keluar dari ruang
prasidang bulan Desember tahun lalu.
Perasaan seperti diaduk. Lega campur gamang? Besar campur kerdil? Haus
campur kenyang? Enggak ngerti, Sist.
Perasaan
itu mirip seperti saya lulus kuliah S1, pindah kosan dari nangor, meninggalkan Bogor-Bandung,
atau ketika angkat kaki meninggalkan tempat kerja saya yang lama. Rindu seperti
mendahului, tapi raga seperti sudah minta angkat kaki. Membayangkan ada rutinitas yang dipaksa putus
oleh keinginan dan tekad sendiri. Mungkin itu rasanya.
Belum benar-benar
utuh si badan ini keluar dari gedung tujuh, ada rasa rindu akan suara-suara,
jalan-jalan, suasana, ketawa, ledekan, keluhan, ujian, ketegangan, dukungan,
dan sop kacang merah murah di kantin psikologi yang harganya sepuluh ribu tapi
enak bukan main karena bumbunya meresap banget.
Meskipun
cuma dua tahun. Tapi ini rasanya benar. Kalau dipikir-pikir, mungkin salah satu
hal yang membuat saya merasa beruntung lanjut kuliah adalah: ketemu orang-orang
yang begini dan dikasih kesempatan untuk berteman dengan mereka.
Kalau
kata Melly Goeslaw mah (kalau gak salah denger, ya…): Satu masa t’lah terlewati, benci dan rindu merasuk di kalbu…
Yasih,
benci karena harus pergi.
Dan rindu
karena akan lama tidak sering-sering lagi bertemu.
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